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The grass is never greener on other side. I’ve always had to tell myself that when I found that I was comparing myself to other people. It took me a little while to accept the natural hair that was mine and embrace the curly life without being tempted by the flat iron. But when I finally reached that level of acceptance, it was accompanied with happiness because I never knew how beautiful my fully natural head really was.
I have 3c/4a hair. My strands are very fine and though other naturals could look at my hair and think I’m living the “good life”, sometimes I wish I could swap lives with my lovely coarse and 4b/4c natural hair sistas. Even if it’s just for a day! Why you ask? I’ll give you a few reasons you may not have thought of before because you’ve been living with your beautiful coarse hair all your life…
You can achieve styles I just can’t
Alright, I had a hard lesson in this when I wanted to rock this same style as a friend of mine with coarse hair. She came in looking all beautiful with her long hair twisted up in a bunch of two strand twists. OMG it was gorgeous! The twists were so thick and fell to her shoulders…it literally looked like fake hair but it wasn’t. Now that’s top notch right there! I loved it so much, I asked her to twist mine up too. I was so excited to have that style too but in the end I was hit with harsh reality.
To say the least, it did NOT turn out the same…looked more like random Ramen noodles tossed on my head than a full and voluminous head of two strand twists. I was very disappointed and right then I realized I couldn’t achieve that look because she had very thick and straighter hair and mine was too fine and curly. Yes, sometimes I definitely get tired of rocking the wash-n-go’s and having curly/coily hair that usually always looks the same even when I try different hair styles. Who knew?!?
You have a head full of hair
Even if your hair isn’t necessarily really long, your thick strands still give the appearance of having sooo much hair! Ugh the beauty! Sure it may take a forever and a day to style but when it IS, you are fierce!
I, on the other hand, have to primp and tease my hair into some volume. And many of the time frizz can be my friend in order to get that volume (Lawd!). I’ll never be able to achieve that beautiful stiff “black panther” afro because my curls just weren’t made to do that. My curly curls make it difficult to get the eloquently designed up-do’s and unorthodox styles without putting heat to it (I know I’m tying this back to my first point but MAN I’m so jealous right now). And your thick hair gives you soo many ways to play with every look you try. I’d literally have fun with your hair for hours. I know it can get time consuming, and even frustrating sometimes but be thankful you have so much to work with and so many options to choose from.
It’s more unique
The cool thing about having 4b/4c hair is that the curl pattern is unpredictable. And because of that NO ONE will have the same texture, curls, and styles you do. In my opinion, a chick who has hair with a 3a/3b/3c curl pattern is going to look more similar to the next chick with the same curl pattern.
And that’s cool because it is gorgeous, but if they all turned their back to you, who probably wouldn’t be able to tell who’s who. Now when a group of 4b/4c chicks get together…every single one of them is not going to look like the next girl. They could turn away from you and you’ll still be able to point out your favorite one. Uniqueness to the MAX!
I want you to think about this every time you look in the mirror with frustration. Don’t take your hair for granted honey…there’s people that would die to have hair like yours! A sad reality is society has only accepted the looser curls because it’s closer to having straight hair…that’s the main reason you find yourself comparing your hair to others. Society is playing tricks with your mind! But remember there WAS a time when curls weren’t accepted at all. So we’re getting to total acceptance, slowly but surely. We’ve gotten one half, now it’s up to you to help get the other half. YOUR half. But it first starts with accepting yourself.